Friday, August 31, 2012

Let's try this again...

I hope the video works this time. Cross your fingers, friends.

P.S. You want to know who is the world's luckiest sonofagun? My husband. He decided to walk down the river a ways the day after the boat incident and what do you think he found in tree snag downriver? His backpack. When he called me he had all of his money laid out on the counter to dry. That guy and his crazy good luck, huh?
Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.8

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Wherein Elise has a heart attack.

How did you guys like listening to the Platters? They're pretty all right, huh? I have another YouTube video for you today, but you'll have to be patient because I have a story first.

So my husband is in Alaska on a fishing trip this week. He scheduled the trip back in June or something and when he booked it I got this pit in my stomach. Just a little knot of worry, but I ignored it because I tend to overthink everything. No, really. I UNDER think a lot of things, but where the immediate physical safety of my loved ones is concerned I am hyper vigilant, believe me.

Fast forward to last night around eleven o'clock. My phone rang and it was DJ (or "Hottie McHottiepants" according to my phone). When I picked up it should have been immediately obvious from his tone that something was amiss, especially since he had gotten in much later than usual. Unfortunately my mouth works much faster than my brain and I said, "Uh oh, did your boat break down?" immediately BEFORE I realized that something really serious had happened.

"Something happened," he said and that little knot that formed in my stomach back in June turned to a lead weight.

I'll paraphrase my husband's story: After dinner he and his fishing buddy decided to fish the river for salmon, so they headed out planning to fish from the shore. When they got there an employee of the lodge they are staying in told them to take out one of their fishing boats because they would have better luck and they would have more fun than they would fishing from the bank.

So DJ and his friend rowed into the river toward what looked like a good fishing spot. The river was running fast yesterday since it has been raining since they arrived in Alaska. As they rowed the current forced them into a log jam.

One thing led to another and their boat overturned. My husband's waders filled with water and he was pulled under the river, with the force of the current pinning him against the snag of logs. He fought the current with everything he had but was pulled even deeper under. DJ is not a weak man and the river still held him down against the logs. He looked up and could barely see the light of day above him through the water.

He said, "I thought, 'This is it...Elise and the kids...This is it.'" He said that he felt strangely peaceful, even as he fought the water, thinking that his life was about to end. He kept pushing and fighting and eventually he prayed, "Please God, not today. Not today." He prayed there under the water, pinned down by the force of the river, when suddenly a few logs gave way and he was pulled through the snag of logs.

He came out of the water downriver and somehow made his way onto the bank. (You can imagine that at this point of his story I was near hysterics.) "Elise, you should have gotten a different phone call tonight. Those logs shouldn't have given way," he said.

There was definite divine intervention up in Alaska yesterday. Needless to say, it has been a life-changing experience for both of us. I am indescribably happy that my husband is safe. And I am endlessly grateful to my Father in Heaven for giving us a few more years together. I will try to remember this when DJ drives me bonkers by throwing his dirty clothes on the floor two feet away from the hamper. This video will be a handy reminder:

(And in case the curiosity is killing you - yes, the boat is still in the river. It's barely sticking out of the water, pushed into the log jam. And yes, DJ's backpack with his driver's license, debit card, and $400 in cash is still floating out to sea toward Russia.)

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.8

Friday, August 24, 2012

Like if George Washington brought you here.

I know what you are thinking. You are thinking, "Elise, you are lonely. Your husband is in another state. You probably stay up through the night listening to music on YouTube and pining away, whatever that means. What songs have you been listening to to intensify your loneliness?"

I am glad you asked.

The Platters. Oh, The Platters. This is one of my personal favorites:

The first time I heard this song I was about ten years old. My dad (he's a deejay - did you know that?) played it at a church dance. I watched the couples dance around the basketball court slash dance floor and my ten-year-old heart almost palpitated right out of my rib cage.

If I wasn't so lazy I would create a playlist of Songs That Make Elise Lonelier, including but not limited to: Anything by The Platters but especially "Twilight Time" and the above, "Chances Are" and "Wonderful Wonderful" by Johnny Mathis, and anything by Nat King Cole. That guy's voice is like eating Nutella straight out of the jar. So rich. So smooth. So awesome.

(The batteries in my smoke detector are low. It has been squawking at me since I got home from Seattle. I know, I know! But you forget - I am a procrastinator. It is my duty to ignore it. Tonight is the first time it is annoying me enough to want to whack it off of the ceiling with a golf club. Or maybe change the batteries.)

I just love music. And YouTube, if you couldn't tell.

(Speaking of George Washington, I feel compelled to apologize to the inordinate number of blog visitors who have been led here by searching "George Washington" on Google. I'm sorry that Google brought you here, whoever you are. I am clearly not an expert on our first president, nor would I be an appropriate source to cite in your research paper. I can, however, count to ten in Spanish and make a decent pork barbacoa, if you're interested. Let's be friends!)
Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

I'm going to the nut shop...

How many days until summer vacation? I'm beginning the countdown to summer 2013. I think it's somewhere in the range of 270 days. That's a whole lot of links in my paper chain. I'm going to need a lot of construction paper.

I had forgotten how much work real life can be. I've spent the last few months living the lifestyle of a sloppily dressed heiress who hasn't been granted access to her enormous trust fund - lounging by the pool, ignoring the housework, fretting over the color of my toe nails. It has been peachy.

And then Washington County School District had to come along and ruin it all.

It has been a busy week. We had two First Day of Schools:

We hosted two birthday parties:

We had a few haircuts by my cute sister Mianne:

Between the immunizations, the mopping, the bill paying, the taking of meals to baby-havers, the scrubbing of the hard water stains out of the toilet bowl with a pumice stone, the grocery shopping, and et cetera, I've come to this conclusion: Real life is for the birds.

I'm going to the nut shop where it's fun.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Bringing home the aluminum!

Remember how I promised to write about our last week in Seattle? Here's me making good on my promise.

After church last Sunday I sent DJ and the kids blackberry picking so that I could accidentally fall asleep while reading 99 cent books on my Kindle. When will I learn, I ask you?! When?! Here are their pickings:

Their eyes are bigger than my stomach.

And so I made jam.

Did you catch that?

I made JAM!

Elise, who can barely remember to remove the plastic wrapping from her frozen Digiorno, made JAM.

It was glorious.

At least I think so. I didn't actually taste it before I left it up in Seattle. For all I know it's total crap. I even gave a jar to my friend without tasting it. I am either wildly confident or stupid. Maybe both.

Sometime after the jam project we drove up to Deception Pass and from thence onto Whidbey Island.

We got to the bridge just as a beautifully scenic fog rolled over the top of it and I fell in love with the Pacific Northwest all over again...

...and DJ bench pressed the bridge.

The day before we flew home our friends invited us over for homemade sushi and a badminton tournament - a winning combination! We divided into four teams and therefore only three teams received a medal and got to sing "O Canada" with their hands over their hearts. Let's play Spot the Canadian:

Why isn't there a medal for fourth place? There should be. I'm inventing one right now and it's aluminum. Filled with chocolate.

Monday morning we woke up really early and hopped a plane to Las Vegas.

We said goodbye to Mount Rainier, the trees, the cool temperatures, and DJ.

But there was no time for mourning. Have you ever been in an airport with four children, three 50 pound suitcases, a carseat, three kid-sized carry-ons, and a purse loaded with granola bars? In Las Vegas?

People stare at you.

It is the Olympics of motherhood. And I got the aluminum medal.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Sunday, August 5, 2012

On Washingtons - the State and the George

It is 90 degrees in Seattle today. You see? Prayer does work! It feels like St. April.

It's been an abnormally warm weekend. Naturally, I took the little people for a swim.

Chancho found a pack of hooligans to run around with:

Don't ask me why, but we've always called this George Washington hair:

To me it looks more like Whig hair. Or maybe Louis the 16th hair. But not George Washington.
See? Not even close.

Summer is drawing to a close, unfortunately. It has been difficult to come to terms with the end of summer this year, especially since it only recently warmed up here. Also because Olivia's hair didn't turn green this year. How am I supposed to know when autumn is nigh if Olivia's hair doesn't change color? Her hair does stand on end, so that's something:

Our time in Washington is almost over - we fly home in one week. I am going to make our last week in Washington amazing. I will take pictures and I will write about it, of that you can be certain. Until next time!