Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Blogging at IHOP

You won't believe what happened last night. I ran into a friend of mine who I only know through blogging at IHOP. Not blogging at IHOP. I know her through blogging and then ran into her at IHOP. It was weird because I've never actually met her before and there she was at IHOP. We ate stuffed French toast together. After the French toast we went shopping at Target, which is something that I haven't done since before the Dreaded Recession. As we browsed through the baby clothes I suddenly remembered that I have four children and that I had no idea where they were.

I thought, "Did I leave them at home?!" I panicked thinking of my four children left alone for hours. What about Tess? What if she ate something out of the carpet and choked? What if DJ cut his feet with the pruning shears? What if Macey and Olivia left to find help and were wandering the streets? My heart raced. I couldn't get to my car fast enough.
That's when the cell phone that I use as an alarm clock rang and I woke up. I didn't just stuff my face with French toast? I haven't been at Target? I haven't lost my kids?

Guys, I am exhausted.

I do not feel like myself.

This afternoon I slaved over two loaves of whole wheat bread, put them in the oven, and then left for Relief Society. Anyone notice a key element of the baking process that I left out? Maybe removing the bread from the oven? I urned-BAY the ead-BRAY. ightly-SLAY. Stink-o-rama.

Like I said, I am not myself today. I have never typed anything in Pig Latin. Burning things, yes. Pig Latin, not usually.

Also, I was taking notes in political science today and I couldn't spell. I repeat, I could not spell. I kept mixing up letters or leaving letters out entirely. (If anyone out there knows what the word "Niskanen" means, please call or email me before May 6th.)

Do you guys ever feel off? Like some inefficient, disgruntled government employee has taken over your brain? I am having one of those days. One of those months.

I hope tomorrow is better.

8 comments:

Kathy H. said...

Bummer about the burned bread and wacky dream.

Jenn said...

Usually when I have vivid dreams, am tired and forgetful it means I am pregnant. So unless you are having one of those 9 months...I don't know what to tell you. Except for, I hope tomorrow is better. Is there a full moon out? That can do it to me too.

Elise H. said...

Oh Jenn, that is not funny. I think that my innards my actually explode if I attempted that again. (There's a lovely visual for you.) Eeek.

Jenn said...

I bet your innards are very lovely!

Marie Says Yes said...

I am willing to go so far as to call this a conspiracy. Some government agent HAS taken over your brain... but luckily, their tenure ends April 31st. You can make it!

P.S. I lived in La Verkin for awhile. That totally explains all willingness to buy into all government conspiracy theories. Just a disclaimer.

Snowfire said...

William Niskanen. Wrote on Public government and bureaucracy. He wrote a famous book in 1971 on the subject.

Scholarly link:
http://www.cato.org/people/william-niskanen

Undergrad link:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_A._Niskanen

http://wikisum.com/w/Niskanen:_Bureaucrats_and_politicians

Meegan, the Evil Stepmother said...

And you guys thought **I** know useless stuff. Now I have to go blather at him about string theory to catch up.

Oh...EVERY SINGLE NIGHT I wake up thinking I fell asleep without putting Gabe to sleep that he's alone on the couch. I hate it. A panic attack every night.

Was IHOP good???

Elise H. said...

Yeah right, Jon. You know you use wikipedia. It's probably where you read about Niskanen. :)

Meegan--IHOP was wonderful in my dream. Oh, when will this recession end?!