Friday, March 26, 2010

Mawwaige! Mawwaige is what bwings us togethah today...

For the following post, I will turn my sister's wedding into a story all about me. Me, me, me. Welcome to my blog.

Last week my little sister Marianne, who is old enough to vote but not yet old enough to gamble, announced that she was going to marry her fiance Frank on Monday instead of in November. (I just call them by their celebrity couple name, MariFran.) Since I'm no good at photography, setting up chairs, or being a deejay MariFran asked me to make their wedding cake. Technically I've never made a wedding cake. However, I have baked cakes and then frosted them and I've been to a few weddings. That's about it as far as my baking credentials go.

Naturally, I agreed eagerly because I am a moron. I spent all day Sunday breaking the Sabbath and baking cakes (and reading Catching Fire). Monday morning I rambled on over to my dad's dance hall to frost some cakes. Let me tell you, frosting cakes takes five things: 1. A long time 2. Eight bags of powdered sugar 3. An entire thing of shortening 4. My mom's expertise 5. One bag of peanut butter M&M's and 6. One animal-style cheeseburger from In 'n Out.

I cannot emphasize the time factor enough. We did not have enough time. Here's my mom checking her watch. It was like 3:00 at this point. The wedding was at 4:00.

We frosted our butts off.

And then I skedaddled on home to comb the chunks of food out of my kids' hair and bring them back for the wedding, but not before I got stuck behind this guy on Snow Canyon Parkway, where the speed limit is 40 mph:


This is when I forced Marianne to pose with the cake monster before the ceremony: "DAB NABBIT, hold still or so help me I'll never let Carrie take you to the dollar store EVER AGAIN!":

This is my son. His official name is Darrell. His nickname is D.J. but his unofficial nickname is Chancho. It's complicated; that's why he's so depressed. One of my favorite things to do to drive D.J. nuts is play with his ears. Can you blame me? Look at how voluptuous and pink and fuzzy they are. I can't stay away from them. I love this little guy's ears. He'll probably need therapy one day.

"Mawwaige. Mawwaige is what bwings us togethah today...":From this angle it looks like MariFran got married in a quarry, but it was actually a beautiful setting, especially once I got there. Aren't Marianne and Frank cute?

7 comments:

Anne said...

Don't believe a word Elise says about me helping! I just helped her panic because that's what I'm good at. Didn't she do a great job on the cake? Definitely NOT worthy of being featured on CAKE WRECKS, which I love by the way - this week's cake had live fish on it IF you can believe that!!

GREAT JOB ELISE - IT's BEEEEAUTIFUL!!!!

Davis family said...

elise-the cake is fabulous. You know if school falls through you can always decorate cakes for some cash!!

Marie Says Yes said...

wow. you totally made that cake awesome! see? attending all those weddings gave you mad skills.
your family is cute. and those are some cute ears.
AND THE ANIMAL STYLE DOUBLE DOUBLE FROM IN AND OUT IS THE GREATEST BURGER OF ALL TIME!!!
one day we can meet there and each eat one in peace and happiness.
the end.

Meegan, the Evil Stepmother said...

My comment is about ME!

I see you neglected to mention whose mad photography skillz are responsible for that epic family picture.

That's right. ME!!!!

Elise, I love your blog. You rock.

Please come make me cake. DJ can fly fish. We can eat cake. The kids can run amuck. Everyone's happy. Except maybe the fish.

Cathy's Blog said...

Elise the cake was fantastic, so quit being so hard on yourself!!

danielandjamaica said...

Do you not read my blog and see that I make cakes? Yours turned out BEAUTIFUL!
I have cake dummies and everything (so you don't have to bake all the cake that nobody is gonna eat) I even have 2 batches of fondant sitting here from the last one I did. (soon to be posted in my blog as part of Mya's Belle birthday cake) Anyway, next time you have to make a cake on short notice, think of me! I've always got stuff laying around for a cake.
BTW was "Mariank" ever a possiblity for the happy couples celebrity name? :)

JustRandi said...

Elise - I think your cake looks fantastic!
and
Your family is beautiful!!!
and
I knew we could be good friends when you mentioned the bag of m&ms. Except mine would be peanut. I'm assuming it was a Costco size bag, of course...