Don't Pick Your Nose

Holy MACKEREL. Macey is in school. I found myself panicking as I was getting her ready for school, giving her little tips (like I haven't had the last five years to prepare her for this day). I'll bet you're wondering what my tips are, aren't you? You're in luck because here they are. Elise's Back-to-School Tips.

1. Do what your teacher says. She is really smart.

2. Sometimes people say mean things. Don't worry about what mean people say. Mean people are dumb.

3. Please PLEASE don't pick your nose and eat it.

4. If you see someone playing all alone, ask them if you can play with them. If they don't want you to play with them then they are dumb (see Tip #2).

5. DON'T CLIMB UP THE SLIDE.

6. For heaven's sake, don't pick your nose and eat it.

Yeah. I think Macey is ready for the world. The real question is, is the world ready for Macey? Bwah ha ha!

P.S. For those of you who were worrying about my neighbors dog-- DJ confessed to my neighbor at church. The dog did not die of elk poisoning. However, in a strange twist the neighbor has found no traces of the saran wrap or freezer paper that the elk was still wrapped in when DJ threw it over the fence. All together now: "DJ! You didn't even take the paper off?!"